Skittles Blenders

Skittles Blenders

I'm a pretty big fan of Skittles. I staunchly maintain that the original Skittles candy is one of the all-time greats. Even if eating too many of them (more than a handful, really) gives me a stomach ache. (Why is that, anyway? I looked online, but couldn't find an answer. One of life's mysteries, I suppose.)

I get pretty excited when they announce a new Skittles variation. Some of these (Crazy Core) have been pretty good. Others (Fizzl'd Fruits) have decidedly NOT. So in addition to the excitement of having a new flavor, you get to wonder if this is going to be a delicious new treat, or a horrifying salty dread with which to threaten bad children.

Now add to this the oddball ad campaign for the new flavor. All of the Skittles ads are pretty weird, that's kind of their thing. (By the way, if everything that guy touches turns to Skittles, how does he dress himself in the morning without turning his clothes to Skittles? How does he wipe himself without turning the toilet paper to Skittles? How does he do his job, which he appears to still be employed at? So many questions, so little time.)

Even so, I found myself particularly hypnotized by the ad for the new Skittles Blenders.

It took me a few viewings to realize what was so captivating: the man's house, it is just so monochrome! But not a perfect monochrome; it's just a very limited palette. Look at the design on his sweater, for example. I can't look away. Kudos to the art direction!

As always, it was many months after they started airing the commercial before I could finally track down a packet. After finally giving them a try, my overall impression is: meh.

There are five new flavors, each of which represents two fruit flavors blended together. This is the same basic algorithm that made Crazy Core Skittles a success. But for some reason, actually blending the flavors seems to make them less interesting. As if the whole is actually less than the sum of its parts.

Pink: Strawberry Lime Blast
This is my favorite out of the bunch. If you had asked me, I would have guessed that strawberry and lime would be a terrible combination. But it comes off as being pleasantly margarita-like.

Red: Cherry Tropicolada
I actually loathe pina colada flavor in any form, up to and including actual pina coladas. So I'm going to exempt myself from reviewing this flavor. I hated it, obviously, but that's not its fault.

Light Orange (this color would be called "peach" or "apricot," but that might be confusing): Mango Lemonade
Mango is kind of a tricky flavor to render well. It's subtle, and just sort of "misc fruity." I thought the lemon flavor might overpower the mango. Maybe the flavor scientists were, as well, because the lemon flavor is just a mild citrusy background taste. These are kind of wishy-washy.

Green: Watermelon Green Apple Freeze
Another flavor surprise. I'm not a big fan of green apple flavor, but it went nicely with the watermelon.

Blue: Melon Berry Burst
This flavor combo went horribly wrong. It's acidic where it should be mild, and leaves a somewhat bile-like aftertaste. My advice is, pick these out and throw them away.