Good & Fiery

Good & Fiery

I should start by saying that I am a real wimp when it comes to spicy foods.  I can't take too many Hot Tamale candies before I start thinking "These must really appeal to masochists."  When I go to a Thai restaurant, I order one or two stars.  Just to frame the discussion that follows.

If you are a fan of spicy foods, you may be able to get more enjoyment out of Good & Fiery.  But I kind of doubt it.

This is the latest new thing from the people who brought us Good & Plenty.  I like Good & Plenty a lot.  I even like Good & Fruity, although I liked them better in their original form - candy coated red licorice - than the jelly beans that they are now.  

Good & Fiery is billed on the box as a "Sweet & Spicy Chewy Candy," which is suitably vague.  I was intrigued by the promise of fruit flavors combined with "spicy."  The flavors are listed on the box as Lemon, Orange, Apple, and Cinnamon.  I pictured something like a combination of a Hot Tamale and a Skittle.  Interesting, right?

Wrong.

I was barely able to discern any fruit flavor in these whatsoever.  The only thing I could really discern was burning.  The yellow ones burned and tasted a little bit like Pledge furniture polish.  The orange ones burned and tasted a little bit like baby aspirin.  I was completely unable to distinguish between Apple and Cinnamon, both of which tasted like burning, and both of which are red.  

Are these really all that hot?  Like I said, I'm a wimp with spicy foods.  And it's not like they print the box with the Scoville units.  But I can tell you this: after my first tentative tasting of only three little Good & Fiery candies at once, I felt a flush spread across my face.  When I tasted three little orange ones immediately afterwards, sweat broke out on my forehead.

At one point I unwisely crammed a whole handful into my mouth.  I did this for you, dear readers, for the all-important "How do all the flavors work together?" test.  I can't tell you how the flavors worked together.  All I can tell you is that I ended up literally flapping my hands in the air in distress.

If you were one of those kids in high school who liked sucking on toothpicks dipped in cinnamon oil, then this may be the candy for you.  However, be warned: after the burn fades, what's left is a peculiarly unpleasant, oily, chemical-tasting after-effect.  It's truly horrible, like what you might get after having lunch cooked up in a test tube in a chemical lab.  

Put simply, there's nothing good about these.  If you want hot and sweet, try Hot Tamales.  If you just want that super scorching sizzle, get some red Warheads.  If you want fruity, get a box of Mike & Ike.  There's simply no reason to buy these, even though the box looks really really cool.