Extra Dessert Delights: Key Lime Pie

Extra Dessert Delights: Key Lime Pie

What hath science wrought?  In a nation wracked by an obesity epidemic, the flavor specialists at the Extra Gum labs have come up with a gum which tastes uncannily like key lime pie.  This is one of the new line of Extra Dessert Delights gum: a gum which is overtly positioned as a dessert.

There are two ways you can go with this.  You can be either "Yay, a taste treat that doesn't make us fatter!" or "Oh sweet merciful Jesus, how sad and empty must your life be if you are eating gum for dessert." 

Then there's a third angle, which I don't think gets enough public acknowledgment, which is that these peppy, flavorful, calorie-free gums are much beloved by anorexics.  Feeling the sharp stabs of hunger?  Of course you are.  Here, have some gum!  It gives you a little kick, tricks your body into thinking that you have eaten something, and all for only 5 calories per stick.

Depressing, right?  But true. 

Extra must be making a fortune from these two markets, the anorexics and the morbidly obese.  Honestly, as a dieter, I will probably buy more of this gum, myself.  It is convincing enough to fend off a sugar craving for an hour or so, and sometimes that's a real win.

When you unwrap a stick of the key lime pie gum, the first smell is of creaminess.  How can you get "creamy smell" from a stick of gum dusted with a fine white powder, I have no idea.  The smell deepens with that classic key lime flavor.  It's citrusy, but milder - tempered by the creaminess. 

Like all Extra flavors, the gum's initial deliciousness wears off fairly quickly.  After the first minute or so, it fades to just a generalized lime-ish-ness sort of taste.  What I would call "misc fruity."  Not unpleasant, certainly.  And a lot less chemical-tasting than many of their gums. 

The key lime flavor lingers for quite a while after the gum itself is gone.  There is some benefit to this, although more in the "freshness" sense than the "delightful dessert" sense.  I often have a stick of gum in the afternoons if I have been drinking coffee all day, particularly if I have something, you know, LINGERING for lunch.  (I recently rediscovered the joy of thinly sliced red onions on a sandwich.)  The lime taste makes for a decent palate cleanser.  And it makes a nice change from the standard "mint" spectrum of gum flavors.

Extra has always had some of the better quality of flavor in its arsenal.  A lot of other companies are diversifying into more unusual flavors, but the flavor fidelity is always terrible.  Orbit seems to be the worst at this.  Any time I get lured into buying a pack of Orbit gum based on the unusual flavor combinations, I always end up sorry, and with a tongue that carries a lingering chemical taste.

Will Extra Dessert Delights satisfy your late-night craving for key lime pie?  Doubtful.  But hey, you could do a lot worse.