Banquet Personal-Size Apple Pie

Banquet Personal-Size Apple Pie

If you have ever looked at a Banquet or Swanson's Pot Pie and thought, "I bet you could stuff that with apple pie filling instead," then congratulations! Your day has come!

I was intrigued by these at the store. "Why, that looks just like a pot pie," I thought. And so it proved to be: the crust, fluted silvery cardboard tray, even the box size is almost identical to that of the pot pies. I have no doubt that the exact same machinery and merchandising line was used. Kudos, really, to the person who dreamed this up.

There is a lot not to like about these pies. But let's focus on the positives, first. If you are tasked with providing dessert for a variety of people, it can be difficult. Let's say you have one kid who likes apple pie, and one who likes berry. You can get each of them their own pie! Team it up with the Edward's individual pies and cakes, and you can have a completely individual experience.

Kids who love pot pies will no doubt find these things both hilarious and appealing. It's just like a pot pie, right down to the way you are instructed to cut a small slit in the top crust before you bake it. I bet kids would love a dinner which consisted of one pot pie and one miniature apple pie. And by the way, I didn't check the instructions, but I'm pretty sure you can bake both of those things at the same time.

I say "bake" because, as with pot pies, I'm pretty sure you do not want to microwave these. An hour (including the pre-heating) may seem like a long time to wait for a small, crappy pie. But at least the crust doesn't get gloopy. (I would totally understand if you just microwaved it, though.)

Okay, now the bad news. These aren't very good. For $1.68 apiece, are you really surprised?

Imagine squeezing the contents of a Hostess Fruit Pie into the crust of a pot pie, and you're getting close. The taste is reasonably acceptable - less artificial than I was expecting - but it's far too sweet. And when I say a pie is too sweet, you know we're in trouble.

A bigger issue with these pies is the ratio of fruit to gloop. Maybe I am spoiled by making my own pies every summer and fall. (And a mighty fine job I do, if I may say so myself.) I aim for a ratio of about 75% fruit and 25% delicious gloop. These pies reverse that ratio: there is far too much gloop.

Odder still was the form of the apples in the apple pie. They were cut into cubes the size of dice. Since when does apple pie contain dice-shaped chunks of apple? Apple pie contains slices of apple. I'm surprised I have to explain this. Eating an apple pie with cubes of apple inside made the whole experience even more strongly pot pie-like.